park connectors, blessing in disguise

i hated it when they started building park connectors at the canal near us. just the thought of ppl crowding the footpath..........oh, i just didnt like it. and yes, now it is crowded and i dont really like it, and besides exercise isnt one of my fav things.

but E loves it, he loves going for bike ride with his dad. he fell down a couple of times, and unlike me he just got up and on the bike again. ah boys!!

he's starting to learn about momentum from going up and down the slope of the park connector. he loves speed so its an topic of interest for him.

also now that he's picking up kiting, its a great place to kite. who would have thought, hubby is good at flying kite. even after all these years of marriage there are little surprises. :-)

so park connector is a blessing after all.

Oh no, what have i done?

FEAR.

Fear is the only thing that i can feel now.

its amazing how excitement can quickly change to fear. now, i am so afraid of the unknown.

a little background......

E's been showing quite a bit of interest in chemistry, he made his own periodic table (with some help in line drawings from me). it took us about 2 mths to get the table done (mainly due to my laziness). he's been reading books from the library, but i've trouble finding the book that really deals with how elements behave, and electron shells form (which i think would really excites him since he loves all things numbers).

and today.......

its the textbook season now. since i was near popular bookstore, i popped by to have a look at chemistry and physics books. chemistry books have exactly what i was looking for and physics had some of what i wanted (he's into momentum and velocity). so bought them and $64 poorer.

just now i was reading the chem book with him and he followed it quite well. and he was very interested in the other chapters too. (is it beginner interest? maybe) and i got a feeling if i teach him, he might actually get through the text.

then.......the question is, what's next??????? i really dont know and i just want to cry as i type this. what if he really can do O levels, way before his age peers. then what are we going to do? he's starting algebra and though we didnt give him questions with squares, today he came up with it on his own and wanted me to teach him. of course i didnt have time, but i know i need to get back to him soon on this as well................

i stopped teaching him primary school stuff after his kindy teacher told me he's too ahead in class and wasnt concentrating. but for our sanity sake we need to occupy him somehow, i mean i really cant be playing racing with him all day (though that would be great for my figure).

music is another problem...........

he doesnt want to practice any music at home. he does play the keyboard now and then, but its more to learn the songs that comes with keyboard. and me being me, cant be bothered to force him. to be frank i think its the reason he's enjoy going to class again. from march to jun/july hubby went with him since he has better musical ears (hahaha arent i brilliant?), anyway, hubby always made him practice and E hated it.

and i made so much noise about hubby making E practice that hubby got fed up and asked me to go to classes with him again. now he doesnt practice much but he can play very well at school. to be honest, i dont know if he plays well, since i dont have musical ears. all i know is the teacher is not standing beside him and teaching him correct keys like she does with others......so i guess that must mean he's ok.

but yamaha individual classes are for those who are min 6yrs old. but i recently found out he may be able to get into NAFA. but of course NAFA is so far. and i really like his yamaha class, at least he's with other kids and figuring out where he fits and how to fight for his rights.

what now.........

i dont want him to grow up in the company of adults. i want him to be with his age group, i want him to play with them, have friends, fight, make up and go through childhood. right now, i dont know how things will turn out.

before he was born i have it all planned out. go to good primary school, sec school, JC, army then uni. now, now i really dont know. i dont even know if he can fit in, if he goes to army. if he goes through the whole system and goes to army after JC, i think he can cope. but if he doesnt? how will he cope? it really worries me.

i am so lost and afraid now.

i want to be.......

i better blog this before i forget........

last last saturday (21/3/09), while we were having lunch at cafe on the ridge at nuss, E said (without us asking) he wanted to be like his music teacher or his kindergarten teacher when he grows up. we were there for lunch before his music school and talking about how to get there if it rained.

this is the first time he tells us what he wants to be when he grows up.....i'm sure he'll change his mind along the way before deciding what he really wants (whatever that might be, as long as he's happy).

so he likes school.....phew

E was coughing again so we wanted to keep him at home, esp with cold weather and air-con at school. yesterday he didnt go to school, but today he really wanted to go so we let him go. i cant believe he's so excited to go to school. i'm quite happy about it. :-)

no school for 2 days

since E was coughing so much, we decided to keep him at home for 2 days. we asked the dr if it would be a good idea and dr said yes (to our relief as we're going to use dr as an excuse). his airways are fine, just the throat is quite sensitive so cough a lot and at home we can encourage him to blow his nose.

E was a little sad today, esp since his dad needs to go to office in the afternoon and missing school.

music music music

i'm not exactly musical, i cant even clap to the beat. we also dont have the music on most of the time. so for first 3.5yrs of his life, he's not exposed much to music - except for hubby and me singing him to sleep.

around 3.5yrs we send him to kindermusik at tanglin mall. he seemed to like it though he didnt really want to participate in singing etc. (he would sing chinese songs though) he was very keen on playing xylophone there and i wanted to buy him one but the teacher at the centre told me to wait till he start the 4yr old class. 

but at christmas, i just couldnt resist getting him one. we got him a cheat one that comes with the music sheets. i showed him how to follow the music sheet (which comes in numbers-and not do re me) to play on xylophone. in 2 weeks, he memorised the notes for songs (oh susanna, twinkle twinkle litte star, jingle bell) and started playing w/o looking at the sheet.

i knew then that i needed to do something quickly. so we signed him up for yamaha junior music course (JMC). it started on 3rd jan 09. he loves the course, he even does the actions for the songs. now they are learning to play do and re notes in the class.

at home he plays his keyboard day and night. its a really good baby-sitter for us. :-) he can now play a few songs from the list of songs that came with the keyboard. and he and his dad are racing to see who can play better w/o looking at the keyboard. (me? i'm allergic to hard work so i dont practice/play)

i sent him to music class because i thought it would be very hard for him. i wanted him to try and learn hard things, i didnt want him to have such a easy life where he learns things w/o much effort. but now....i'm facing another happy problem. 

should i get someone to teach him to play piano in parallel with JMC? i wonder if yamaha allows its teachers to give ad-hoc classes. now he's playing well but i think his finger positions are not right. taking him out of JMC is out of the question, because i really want him to mix with other kids and learn with them. 

new bike

i've been wanting to get him a bike since he was 2. but everytime i asked him he wasnt interested. and i wanted him to crave for it, dream about it and finally feel the joy of having it. so i was determined not to buy the bike if he didnt want it.

recently he showed some interest and was willing to try on bikes. oh we tried so many models and many times on the same models. we let him chose the bike he liked and it was so hard to find the one with the right feel. hubby was teaching him about cost and benefits of each bike. we have always been telling him that though we have money, it is limited and we must be careful on how and what we spend it on. 

E was so happy after we bought the bike. he begged me to let him bike to his school (which was about 3-4km away) the next day!! bike to school to in singapore? no way. but that showed he really liked him bike. 

skipping school.......

we're sick again. we seemed to catch sore throat often. and usually infection will go up to the nose and all the complications of blocked/runny nose will follow.

E had a fever last friday, we (all three of us - since we're all sick) saw dr on sat, wasnt better by monday so saw dr again. and i think we have to see the dr again tomorrow.

E really wanted to go for his music lessons on sat, and dr said ok as long as he had no fever. but we didnt sent him to class as he was overtired and really bouncing all about. so he napped at home instead. he was so much nicer to be with after the nap. 

monday, tuesday - i let him go to school since he was quite alright except for some runny nose and cough. i didnt want him to know that when you are sick you dont have to go to school. last week i was already having problem leaving him at school. i dont know why but he wanted me to stay for 2 days that i sent him on my own. i already have enough stress and i dont really need fake leg pains/tummy aches etc....

but his cough is getting worst. he even woke up in just now (after sleeping for an hour) because of cough. so i guess, i will be seeing the dr tomorrow and will keep him at home for 2 days. ummm......i wonder what i should tell him.......

i was told to stop teaching him at home........

we finally send him to school. he was ready, he liked the school and we liked the school. i think it was harder for me than for him on the first day. my son, 4yrs old and starting a kindy.

on the third day, his teacher told me he was snatching things and hitting other kids. i told her to purnish him and that we're perfectly ok with time-out as long as he wasnt shamed. i also told her that he may need things to occupy him and that i'd be happy to provide materials (not that i have any ready) so that he wont be bored at school. we also talked to him at home. after that, he stopped hitting and snatching.

a week after the school started, his teacher spoke to me again. she said, as i told her before E (my son) knows alot of things and is very advanced (her words, not mine) and if it would be possible for me to stop teaching him at home. what she didnt understand was his maths understanding is around primary 2-3 level. 

and no i cannot stop teaching him. after all, it is all him. the sums i give him always turn out too easy for him and not numerous enough. he usually write and do his own additions, multiplication. i dont even have time to check every single one. whatever intersts him he will just do and do and do. i did explain to her and she suggested he can bring a book of his choice to school. 

more than 4 weeks have passed since that "talk", are the things getting better? i'm not sure..............